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2020 Vision

June 30, 2020

The definition of 20/20 vision is a term used to express normal visual acuity (the clarity of sharpness of vision).

 

It’s interesting how a year correlated to “vision” has been blurred by COVID19. Events that are grabbing our attention make it clear that this pandemic touches everyone, from loss of life, the number of people who are asymptomatic, protests, destruction of property, anger among citizens, unemployment, the demise of small businesses, and the lack of control we have over the situation. With no end date to the madness, the uncertainty is just that - uncertain. Our lives are forever changed and our perspective on what the future may hold has shifted as we all try our best to keep our head above water and wait for the rough waves to turn calm. 

 

With new spikes in the virus transmission, I personally don’t feel as safe as I once did. I have found that besides my morning routine of leaving the house for a walk, light jog, or bicycle ride around the neighborhood, I am now hesitant of going out. I am more aware of my surroundings and wear a mask to protect myself and others. It is interesting how differently people regard the severity of this virus. 

 

It’s been a huge struggle to stay at home as I often think of the many things I miss. I long to have group conversations at work, especially speaking to my coworkers and keeping up with their lives. I miss the gym and those who come to my class for the same reason. I love talking to people, getting to know them, and love to see progress in their lives. I would love to speak to a neighbor without remaining six feet apart and wearing a mask. Ah, the good ol’ days.

 

Going to the grocery store or driving over to my parents’ house is now filled with apprehension (and excitement at the same time). I’m able to leave the house, which totally excites me…but then I am very apprehensive when I get into public, put on my mask, and carefully watch what I touch. 

 

Long spurts of staying at the house makes me feels as if everything is closing in on me. How do people with prison sentences live their lives with a positive perspective by doing the same thing day in and day out for years? I feel like I’m starting to understand the mental torture of being stuck in the same place day after day and wanting to escape reality. I also have a better understanding how people struggle with depression and loneliness due to lack of personal interaction with others. I hope this year ends on a positive note, as I am going stir crazy when I let my mind wander and get consumed by the world we currently live in. 

 

It’s been said that we can’t control events, but we can control how we react to them. I have my good days where my energy level is high, my outlook brighter, and the day happily moves along. I also have bad days where it can be difficult to get myself out of bed, get motivated to get out of the house for my dose of daily exercise, and find the day drags and every minute feels like an eternity. I never thought I would be in this situation, but I’m sure I’m not the only one who feels this way!

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